People often ask me what is the most outward sign to predict if someone you’re observing is a good teammate. My answer is measureless Mudita.
Watch how they respond to others’ success.
Over the course of the last month and a half, I’ve spent a fair amount of time watching competitions at several large, elite-level, youth sporting events. Since I didn’t “have a dog in the race,” I had no personal interest in any of the events’ outcomes.
This situation allowed me to observe the participants through an unbiased lens.
It didn’t take me long to identify those who were driven by their own self-serving agendas. They were the ones who were quick to point fingers whenever their teams began to struggle.
The coaches yelled at the players. The players yelled at each other. And the parents yelled at the officials, players, coaches, and each other. I heard all the usual cliches:
“Come on! Get your head in the game!”
“Let’s go, Coach. Get them together!”
“You’re missing a good game, Ref!”
“That wasn’t Avery’s fault!”
Seeing team members become consumed with assigning and/or deflecting blame when their teams struggle wasn’t especially surprising. In fact, I would label this response as standard procedure for underachieving teams.
What I found to be far more enlightening was how everyone responded to their teams’ success.
The players and parents who were quick to point fingers whenever their teams struggled clapped and cheered exuberantly during moments of success—if they or their child were the ones who did something well.
Whereas the players and parents who resisted the urge to point fingers whenever their teams struggled clapped and cheered exuberantly anytime any team member did something well.
The latter group embraced a key tenet of being a good teammate: When one of us wins, we all win. They celebrated their teammates’ achievements as if those achievements were theirs.
Good teammates possess the ability to find happiness in their teammates’ achievements. The Buddhists refer to this virtue as Mudita, which translates to vicarious or sympathetic joy.
Mudita is delighting in the happiness of others. Practicing it eliminates unhealthy, culturally-disruptive behaviors like jealousy, envy, and resentment. It also generates virality.
Seeing team members show outward signs of Mudita (e.g., smiling, clapping, cheering, fist pumping, etc.) when fellow team members achieve is an inward sign of selflessness.
How much Mudita do genuine good teammates have? Measureless. The amount of joy they derive from their teammates’ achievements has no limits. They are perpetually happy for others’ happiness, regardless of their own current state of achievement..
An individual who demonstrates measureless Mudita is likely to possess many of the other defining characteristics of a good teammate since being a good teammate starts with a selfless commitment to something bigger than oneself.
In a world where social media is dominated by selfies and self-centeredness, the selfless, ironically, make the biggest impact.
As always…Good teammates care. Good teammates share. Good teammates listen. Go be a good teammate.
